i fell off the wagon

once again I fell off the bandwagon. The holiday came and school started to get tough and I get stressed and eat. I am so tired of doing this to myself. I do good for a week or two then fall off for 2 weeks then I feel bad about and the cycle continues. I have to take on control of this situation. I am prayerful but maybe I am not giving it over. Maybe I am trying to be too much in control over something I obviously need help to manage. I feel so guilty for doing this to my body when I know better. I know the consequences to this destructive behavior.


What I am not going to do is get all down on myself about it. I am going to shake myself off and pray and start again. Pick up where I left off the thing about it is I know that I am not giving this 100%. I have to want this for me and more than anything else. I know I can do it because I have I just need to get it moving.

I am going to the MD today because I have been having armpit pain so I just want to get it looked at just to be safe. I will also discuss with him my issues and see what he suggests. It's time I go get tested for diabetes. I have to change my life. God I am asking you to help me get a handle on this weight before I self destruct. One day at a time.

Day 2

yesterday wasn't so bad. i used all my WW points plus 6/35 flex points and i am ok with that. today i planned my meals this morning so all i have to do is eat what is on the plan for today. makes it a little easier for my hectic lifestyle.

for this week i want to focus on nutrition and next week i plan to start 30 min cardio session three times a week. for today i will do the best i can. 1 meal at a time! :o)

Day 1

Weekly mantra: One meal at a time.

today i had an 8am class so i was rushing out of the door and grabbed a tangerine, granola bar yogurt cup and a bottle of water. i have clinical tonite so i will bring my lunch with me and have a snack before clinical. i think the hardest part for me is getting started. once i get going and get in a groove then i typically do well. i am going to take it one meal at a time. try to plan ahead as much as i can and make better food choices.

Here is my plan: I have integrated the biggest loser plan with WW
Daily
5 servings of fruits and veggies
2-3 servings of protein including dairy
2 servings of whole grains
2 servings of oils/unsaturated fats (200 cals)
100 fl oz of water

Sample Menu Breakdown: 1 plan to eat every 3-4 hrs this is what was successful in the past
Breakfast

• 1/2 protein serving
• 1 fruit/veggie
• 1/2 whole grain

Snack

• 1 fruit
• 1/2 protein

Lunch

• 1/2-1 protein
• 1veggie
• 1/2 -1 whole grain

Dinner

• 1/2 -1 protein
• 2 veggies
• 1/2-1 whole grain

Snack: Optional

Discovery....

i decided to start this blog in effort for it to assist me in losing weight. i got MARRIED 35 days ago. we had an AWESOME wedding now that all the wedding hoopla is over i feel that it is time to really focus on my weight. i am turning 31 in 11 weeks! we want to have children in the future so it is past time for me get a handle of this weight issue.








my story is like many others in that i have always been overweight. well since about 4-5th grade. i just dealt with it until i got frustrated and decided to make a change so a month away from my 26th b-day i began my weight loss journey. well it was successful. when i walked in ladies choice fitness on 12/20/05 i was 281.5 lbs and by 08/06 i was 221.o lbs i lost 60lbs in a 8 months! well by 10/06 i was down to 218 i hit a plateau while training in the gym i tore my plantar tendon and that where things went downhill. i met my husband during that same month about a 2 weeks later. when we first started dating i was so diligent about my weight loss and then over time i got comfortable in being in a relationship that i was not as focused on maintaining my weight. so i began gaining the weight back will at first i thought it was cute. i can remember going to the dr in 7/07 being 250 lbs at that point i am like oh i have to do something about this. well then i started a doctoral program that has taken over my life. when i get stressed i eat. we got engaged 1/25/09 and i said to myself ok i have to lose this weight before the wedding. we got married 10/09/10 and did i lose weight? NO!

i would lose and gain but overall the course of our relationship i have gained 75LBS yes you read it correctly 75 lbs. last thursday i decided that it was time for me to get back on the weight loss wagon. when i lost the weight before it was all diet and exercise no drugs , surgery, etc. so i am going back to what i know. i am thinking about joining WW but for now it's about food journaling and counting calories until i can make a final decision. i think WW is worth doing but i have read that they are changing it up in Dec so i may wait until then.

Today's weight: 304.6 (i'm 5'11)


Goals
ST Goal #1: 275 by 01/26/11 (my 31st b-day)
ST Goal #2: 240 by graduation 05/7/11
LT Goal: 200 by 10.09.11 (our 1st anniversary)


This week's goal:

1. Eat healthy breakfast daily
2. 1800 cals per day
3. Journal daily
4. Cardio 3x - 30min sessions
   

these are pics from our honeymoon in jamaica and when i look at them i can't believe how i look. but it's ok because i am committed to making lifestyle changes. this was less than 3 weeks ago.